Endurance: Movements Towards Community

“In a real sense all life is inter-related. All men are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly. I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be, and you can never be what you ought to be until I am what I ought to be…This is the inter-related structure of reality.” –MLK

I’ve noticed that endurance is not found in isolation, but rooted in relationships and community. For this reason, I purposefully surround myself with people who have transformed how I see, engage, and be with others in a way that gives me purpose. As we enter into the suffering and pain of our brothers and sisters together, we find ways to endure towards hope. We find ways to see the world as it is, and collectively move towards the world as it should be. When we remind one another that we are seen, that we are loved, and that we belong, somewhere along the way, we interweave our stories and find ways to carry one another forward towards beloved community. 

I See You [Dignity]

In June of 2010, I traveled to Rwanda with 5 other students from Seattle Pacific to listen and learn from the most resilient people I have ever encountered. Even now, six years later, I find myself returning to their stories which portray endurance and what it means to embody hope amid the unfathomable daily realities of life after trauma. 

One afternoon, we found ourselves sitting with over 40 women who gathered frequently in the church to share their burdens with one another to find comfort and healing. I met Odette, a widow of the 1994 genocide, who committed herself to sharing her story of survival, grief, and movements toward healing with other women who survived the genocide, though everything they knew was stripped away from them. Odette calls this group Wrira, which means “don’t cry” in Kinyarwanda. This sacred space was created for other women to listen, mourn, weep, and lament the brokenness that swept over Rwanda together. It was intended to move women who once felt isolated in their grief towards community. To remind them that they are seen and they are worthy of healing. 

I noticed in Rwanda that the reconciliation process starts when we give space to recognize the dignity and humanity in each person. Each woman had a story of pain that was her own and each woman was given the space to share and be reminded that she was seen and loved. As each shared her pain, they together moved toward healing. They endured. 

I Love You [Proximity and Presence]

The sacred life stories, like the ones I heard in Rwanda, are testimonials that endurance and resiliency are a result of continually envisioning the world as it should be, even while in the wilderness. This vision flourishes when we pursue it together. All throughout scripture, we are guided to “spur one another towards love” (Hebrews 10:24). When we do this, we call one another near (proximity) and invite others into a sacred space with us (presence). Proximity moves us away from cheap compassion, which doesn’t cost us anything, towards true compassion. A compassion that guides us to walk beside one another through the ordinary and mundane aspects of life. 

Like the women in Rwanda, I thrive and endure towards hope and healing because of those who get close and create sacred space to gently welcome and be present to my pain. These past couple of years, I vividly remember the moments where I have been overcome with deep grief due to the violence against black and brown bodies. When the feelings become too familiar and the words so few, there are moments where my grief leads me to wrestle with my worth as a black woman within this society. In these moments, my people remind me that I am worthy of love as they make themselves available and choose to be actively present with me in the pain. They’ve taught me about a long-lasting love, one that gives hope. They’ve moved me towards love, and seeking more of it. 

They’ve done this with great patience, love, and care that has led me to find strength and purpose. By getting close and being present to my pain, I am reminded through intentional community that I am worthy of love and belonging. This is what spurs me towards love and gives me endurance to pursue beloved community. 

You Belong [Community]

Love is patient. It does not rush. It does not fix. It gives space for the Spirit to heal and restore. It moves us as close as we can get to the pain and suffering of our brothers and sisters.  It teaches us to sit in the wilderness with one another. I believe that this type of compassionate love is found in community. Henri Nouwen writes that as we stay rooted in God’s vision for our world, we become “compassionate people, deeply aware of our solidarity in brokenness with all of humanity.”

One aspect of solidarity is the willingness to see all life as sacred and worthy of love and belonging. We’re reminded that we belong by recognizing that when one part of the body hurts, we all hurt. When one part of the body weeps, we all weep. It is in beloved community that we find the endurance to identify our false selves that keep us bound to the brokenness of the world, so we may strive towards our true self that is bound up in God’s promises of healing and restoration. 

I continue to invest in movements towards justice and love because I believe that I can never be what I ought to be until my story is woven up with the story of my neighbors. Community is the place where I am reminded that I am seen, I am loved, and I belong. This is how I endure, through beloved community.